Okay, he'd listened to Carter without significantly off-topic comment, he'd listened to Daniel waxing lyrical about the chicken scratches he'd found and filmed, he'd listened to Teal'c's brief endorsement of what Carter'd had to say. He'd managed to do all that with hardly a sign of sarcasm, pissiness, incipient boredom or general smart-assedness. And it had been a stretch, it had to be said. But... enough was enough. He just wanted the debriefing to be over, done, in the past, finito, so that he could get the hell out of Dodge, get home and kick back with a beer or two. Oh yeah, and get laid, that was pretty high on his list of priorities too. What the hell else was there to say? Went to P9-yadda, watched Daniel get a hard-on over some chicken scratches, glyphs, whatever - oh and completely incidentally, my archaeologist got a little frisky shortly after that and needed a hand job up against a wall - huh? I guess it must have been the heat, Sir. Or as you say, the excitement of discovery - which he was prevented from reciprocating by the good offices of my 2-IC with her usual impeccable sense of timing. Yes, Sir, I agree, Sir - I got lucky there. When you're right, you're right. A good 2-IC is better than a bucket of cold water and blue balls are a mere bagatelle when weighed against the possibility of getting busted.
Just how freakin' aggravating could life get, for crying out loud?
He shifted irritably in his chair.
"Colonel? Anything to add?" Damn it, now Hammond was showing early signs of getting pissed with him despite his otherwise (mostly) exemplary behaviour. That had to be the frosting on his cookie. Perfect end to the perfect mission.
"Oh, no Sir. I think you've heard it all. From the military standpoint the planet was a bust. Nothing of any strategic significance. No pay-off at all. No naquadah to speak of, no one left to ally with, no huge honkin' space guns. Just a mud ball, sir, and a few ruined walls with some chicken scratches on them." Jack shrugged and gave Hammond what he devoutly hoped came off as an apologetic smile.
"In other words, you were bored stiff because you were getting no action." A glint of sympathetic humour had replaced the slightly chilly expression in Hammond's eyes now, and Jack capitalised on it.
"In a nutshell, Sir. Definitely stiff, stiffer than stiff; that sums it right up. And it was hot. Very hot. We were all very hot." He glanced at Daniel from the corner of his eye as he said the words, mildly gratified to see a slight flush stain his cheekbones as the corners of his mouth quirked and he deliberately ducked his head and studied his notes closely so as not to have to meet anyone's eyes. Oh yes, Daniel knew exactly what he was getting at. Didn't hurt to underline it though, he felt he had a genuine grievance here. "Did I mention that it was hot, Sir? And that there was no pay-off?"
"You did, Colonel. But I suspect nowhere near at the length that you would have liked." The amusement in Hammond's voice was plain to hear, but Jack knew better than to push his luck too far, with either George or Daniel, so remained silent, grimacing as his fingers drummed on the tabletop in front of him.
Daniel had himself back under control now, but his eyes gleamed behind his glasses as he said, "Well, I, uh, wouldn't say that exactly, Jack." He gave a small smile and shrugged, turning to Hammond. "I really quite enjoyed the change of pace, and the aforementioned, um, 'chicken scratches' were very interesting from the archaeolinguistic point of view. Some of the masonry, too, was quite extraordinarily well put together, and I had the opportunity to examine a section of it really quite closely after I'd finished filming. Surprisingly well done, given the level of technology implied in the writings I found, which may or may not have some significance when my department has a chance to translate them fully." He turned back to Jack and continued lightly, "So, maybe no immediate payoff from your point of view this time, Jack, and I can understand your frustration at having no opportunity to, uh, shoot at anything, but it certainly wasn't a completely unrewarding experience for me. Better luck soon, huh?"
Jack heard the very slight emphasis on the word 'immediate' and shot him a look from under lowered brows. Daniel was managing to keep a completely straight face, the little shit, but the expression in his eyes as they briefly met Jack's was pure mischief, overlaid with something else that he couldn't quite put his finger on. Suddenly Jack's sour mood shattered as he saw the funny side and he chuckled internally. Nothing to shoot at, eh? Nothing more nor less than the truth there. On the surface, though, he kept his game face on, looked Daniel square in the eye and answered more or less at face value.
"It'd better be sooner rather than later, Daniel. We really need to score, and score big."
"Actually, Jack, I don't disagree with you on that." Daniel backed this promising statement up with a small quirk of his lips.
"And I'm quietly confident that it will happen, gentlemen," Hammond interrupted smoothly, intent on heading off the verbal sparring match he saw looming on the horizon, serenely unaware of the real effect his words were having. "I know you've been going through a dry spell recently, Jack, and the lack of action on this mission probably hasn't helped, but the law of averages says that that has to change. You're bound to get lucky soon."
Oh, good one! This time he couldn't resist cranking things up just a little further. "It's right at the top of my 'to do' list, Sir." Beside him he heard a little choke of air, artistically turned into a small cough and a muttered 'excuse me'. First blood to the Colonel - but his triumph was short-lived.
"The General's right, sir, it has to happen." Carter was quick to offer her reassurances as well. "Things will come together, eventually."
Okay, it was official, he was in trouble now: Carter's oblivious double entendre wasn't just tickling his funny bone, it was all-out assaulting it.
"Indeed, O'Neill. Major Carter is correct. Do you Taur'i not have a saying, 'Everything comes to he who waits'?"
"Exactly," Daniel added soothingly. "Things will all slide into place, you'll see."
Mercifully no one seemed to expect any answer other than a grunt of assent - which was a blessing Jack considered, as he was by no means sure that he could contain the mild hysteria bubbling just under the surface if he had to say anything, particularly when from the corner of his eye he spotted Hammond nodding approvingly at Daniel's pacific tone. This time, he didn't dare look at Daniel or anyone else while he got himself under control. He took a deep breath and forced himself to concentrate on what Hammond was saying.
"Well, on that philosophical note, people, we'll call it a day. When are you next up, Colonel?"
He was gonna lose it, he knew he was. He cleared his throat to cover up the gurgle that he could feel pushing its way out. "Uh, day after tomorrow, Sir. If nothing crops up in the meantime." His stomach muscles were aching from the effort of suppressing the fit of laughter he felt coming on and he bit the inside of his lip, hard. Jeeze. He really needed this debriefing to be over before he disgraced himself. And particularly before he was called on to explain exactly what was so funny.
"Very well. I'll expect your written reports on this mission by eleven hundred hours tomorrow. Dismissed."
Hammond, Carter and Teal'c scraped back their chairs and stood up: Jack shuffled the papers in front of him to buy himself some time as they filed out, peripherally aware that Daniel was doing much the same thing. He didn't risk looking up until he was sure the room was empty. When he raised his eyes and looked at Daniel, he realised that he was scarlet in the face, his shoulders quivering with ill-suppressed giggles, and he just couldn't hold it in any longer. His own shoulders heaving, Jack dropped his head to the table, arms wrapped round his sides, and laughed 'til he cried.
Eventually he managed to pull himself together. Lifting his head and wiping tears from his eyes, he cleared his throat and said, "Well, that was mature."
Daniel's eyes were teary too as he pulled off his glasses and applied himself to cleaning them as he replied, "Shit, it was funny though, you must admit. I almost lost it at Hammond myself: 'When are you next up, Colonel?'" he mimicked. "He couldn't have come up with anything better if he'd planned it! Anyway, you started it."
"No, Daniel, you started it back on that freakin' mud ball."
Daniel looked up from his task and said in a low voice laced with promise, "Yeah, about that. I'll have to think of something special to make it up to you. Although I've got a couple of ideas in that direction already."
Jack groaned theatrically as he felt his dick twitch. "Damn it, there goes Rule Two. What is it with you today? When did you suddenly become such a fan of living dangerously?"
"Roughly when I--" Daniel broke off abruptly as an airman came into the room and saluted smartly.
"Sorry to interrupt, Sir, Dr. Jackson --"
"It does seem to be the tendency du jour for assorted Air Force personnel," Jack muttered, half under his breath, and Daniel had to duck his head yet again to mask his grin.
"Sir?" The airman was puzzled.
"Oh, nothing, Airman. Doesn't matter. Was there something you wanted?"
"Sir, the General would like to see you briefly before you leave for the evening, Sir."
Jack shrugged and rolled his eyes as he stood up from the table and shoved his hands into his pockets. "On my way. Catch you later, Daniel."
"Sure. See you."
The house was dark when Jack finally got home, not a light showing from the street. If it hadn't been for Daniel's old rust bucket pulled up in the driveway, he'd have said the place was deserted. Still, that was a good sign: Daniel was obviously in the bedroom then, which was pretty well exactly where Jack wanted him to be, and pronto, so that was going to be a time saver at least.
Jack parked with his usual efficiency and headed for the front door. Smiling as he opened it, he called out as he crossed the threshold, "Daniel?"
No answer. The house was as dark inside as out.
"Hey, Daniel! Where are you?"
Silence. Damn. Daniel had to be asleep. Ah well, he'd soon change that state of affairs. Daniel owed him big time and boy, was he ever going to collect. He turned and closed the front door, shooting the security locks into place.
The only warning he had was a sudden movement of the air behind him, felt rather than heard, before he was propelled forward by the force of an impact from behind for the second time that day, hands yet again pinioned to each side, and a low, breathy voice gusted hot against his ear as it said, "Hold it right there."
"Jesus, Daniel, are you trying to give me a heart attack? What the hell are you doing prowling around in the dark anyway? We have a power outage or something?"
"Nope. We're going to conduct an experiment."
There was something about the tone of Daniel's voice that warned Jack not to make a smart reply to this statement; that got the back of his neck prickling and started a flutter of excitement in his gut.
"An experiment? What kind of experiment?"
"An experiment in self-control. Do you trust me?"
The flutter was becoming more pronounced and Jack was suddenly acutely aware of the heavy warmth of his dick as it started to stir between his legs.
"You know I do."
"Good." The satisfaction in Daniel's voice was plain to hear. "This is what I want you to do. Go to the bedroom and strip. There's a scarf lying on the nightstand. Blindfold yourself with it and lie down on the bed - make sure that you can't see anything at all. Grab onto the bedrail with your hands and lie with your legs wide apart. When I come through and put on the lamp, I want to see exactly what you've got for me."
Jack's breath hitched as he listened to the words and the picture floated into his head of himself lying naked, blind and vulnerable, presenting himself, arranging himself, for Daniel.
"Can you do that? Jack?"
Jack came back to himself with a start and said, "Oh yeah." It came out as a croak between lips gone suddenly dry.
Daniel pressed his lips briefly against his and Jack felt them curve into a smile as he whispered, "It'll be good, I promise. Be quick."
With that last quiet comment, Daniel pushed against and off him and padded away into the darkness. Jack gulped in a couple of deep breaths, feeling the wood of the front door cool against his cheek, willing himself to calm down, hold on, not lose it too soon. He pushed away from the door and turned to head for the bedroom.
He made his way through the total darkness by a combination of touch and familiarity. Thirteen paces along the side of the living room before the change of echo told him he was in the hall. Bathroom door, five paces, bedroom door. Six paces to get from the door to the chair: he counted them off in his head without conscious thought. In the distant reaches of the house he could hear Daniel moving around for a moment or two, and then nothing. He was completely in the dark and all he could hear was his own breathing and the blood surging in his ears.
Jack's fingers weren't cooperating as he fumbled with his shirt buttons, and he swore viciously as the last one stubbornly refused to give way, yanking at it impatiently so that it popped off and skittered across the floor. He toed off his loafers as he dealt with his jeans button and fly, then shucked jeans and briefs with one sharp downward tug, snagging his socks and dragging them off on the way. Five paces from the chair to the nightstand. He groped across the top of it and found a length of soft cloth with his fingertips. When he strained to see, it made an inky pool of shadow, dark even in the darkness. He bound it securely across his eyes as he lowered himself slowly to sit on the bed. Lying back and scooting around, he gripped the bedrail, shifting his hands until he had a comfortable grip, then drew up his feet and dropped his knees to spread his legs wide.
Unable to see at all, Jack was acutely aware of the rest of his senses. He strained to hear where Daniel was, but since those first few moments after he'd left Jack standing against the front door, he'd made no further sound. If he hadn't known better, Jack would have said he was completely alone in the house. The blindfold lay heavy and soft across his eyes, reminding him again of his position and his excitement mounted another notch. Daniel could be in the room right now, standing quietly beside the bed, staring down at him, planning who knew what. It was eerie, but it was unbelievably erotic too, and it got even more so as he waited, the tension becoming an almost palpable thing.
He wasn't sure quite how long he'd lain there before he became aware that at last he was no longer alone, that something about the quality of the silence in the room had changed. Daniel was close by, watching him, staring at him, he was sure of it; he could feel his gaze on his skin like the heat of the sun. A cat's paw of arousal stroked up his spine and his dick jerked as he tightened his grip on the rail.
"Good. Very good." Daniel's voice was rich with satisfaction and heavy with lust: Jack heard the nuances clearly in his sightless state. "You have no idea how beautiful you look, lying spread out for me like that."
Nails raked gently down the soft skin of his inside thigh and his cock strained skyward again.
"Sshh." A gentle finger lay briefly against his lips, quickly withdrawn when he attempted to trap it and suck it into his mouth. "No talking, not yet. No touching, either. Just wait and imagine, anticipate and feel." Nails scored across his flesh again, unbearably slowly, over his chest and down his side, harder this time, the scratching staying only just the right side of pain.
Jack didn't normally consider himself an overly visually imaginative man, but damn, this was making his imagination work overtime. He could picture Daniel against the soft cloth covering his eyes, see him as clearly as if his eyes were open wide: lightly furred skin glinting in the soft lamplight; small, tight smile curving his lips; an expression of intense concentration in smoky blue eyes dilated with desire. Jack's fingers twitched, but he held on to the rail.
The bed creaked and dipped to one side as Daniel moved his weight onto it. Soft fingertips trailed randomly over Jack's skin, feather light dabs on skin already sensitised by the scratching, unbearably gentle, intensified by the silence in the room, making him sigh and shudder. A finger and thumb rolled one of his nipples, tugging at it just so, surprising a muffled yelp out of him at the force of the jolt of pleasure it gave to his balls, and just as suddenly withdrew as his hips jerked off the bed. Fingers carded through his pubic hair, round the base of his dick but carefully not touching it, skirting his balls to trail down his thigh again.
And all the time, profound silence, so different to Daniel's usual vocal appreciation, as Jack watched him inside his head. And damn, but he wanted to take his hands from the bedrail and run them down over smooth, heated skin, itched to feel the weight of Daniel's balls settling into the palm of his hand, the solid warmth of Daniel's dick, fat and heavy in his grasp, just as he had earlier that day. Jack tightened his grip and hung on, his hands flexing against the rail as his senses remembered texture and heat and he saw again the look on Daniel's face before he gasped and came for him against that wall.
Daniel was intent on taking his time, carefully stoking the fires, holding Jack on the edge of desperation as he carefully stroked down one leg and up the other. This time though he upped the ante, trailing his fingers along the crease between thigh and groin and down over Jack's balls to the sensitive skin behind them, then further back to Jack's asshole. A finger circled and teased and Jack felt a wave of heat course through him as he bit back the urge to demand that Daniel get a move on, damn it! He needed Daniel's fingers inside him like he needed his next breath. He got his wish as the questing finger slipped a little way inside him, massaging the ring of muscle, encouraging it to relax before sliding in deeper as Jack sighed his approval and need.
One finger became two and Daniel fucked his ass with them slowly, stretching him further with each languid thrust, leaning over to bite and lick at the inside of Jack's thigh. Damn, that had to have marked him, high up and close to his groin: the thought of wearing the physical evidence of Daniel's lovemaking made him squirm and bear down as hard as he could, despite being hampered by his hold on the bed.
Daniel chuckled at that, a low, throaty sound. "God, I love watching you like this, losing control because of me."
Jack's only response was to growl, and he was satisfied in the dim recesses of his conscious thought to hear an answering growl from Daniel: he wasn't the only one losing it here then. Something of his smugness must have shown on his face however, as the fingers abruptly withdrew and Daniel's weight shifted from the side of the bed. Jack made no sound, unwilling to believe that Daniel would leave him like this, straining instead to hear what he was doing. He wasn't disappointed as the foot of the bed dipped and Daniel crawled up between his legs. He expected the sensation of fingers at his anus again, but instead felt something cool pressing against his entrance: it took him a moment or two to process the information that what he felt wasn't any portion of Daniel's anatomy. He felt himself stretch and open as something (something!) popped inside him, heard Daniel's deep throated moan of satisfaction as the process was repeated, then repeated twice more. His turn to echo Daniel's moan as the feeling of wonderful fullness penetrated his wits and escalated his excited pleasure: the sound turned into a full-throated yell as Daniel leaned forward and swallowed him whole.
Jesus Christ, he'd died and gone to heaven. His ass felt full and heavy, his nerve endings on fire, and the suction that Daniel was applying to his dick was making white lights flash behind his eyes. He thought confusedly to himself that he'd never, ever in his life experienced anything quite like this; that he really, really wanted to know what Daniel had put up his ass and why his guts were tingling because of it; that he never, ever wanted it to end. And then he stopped thinking altogether as the twin sensations from ass and cock threatened to overwhelm him completely.
He was poised on the very brink when the silky, slippery suction surrounding his dick slowly withdrew and the cold air hit, making him shrink a little, but not for long, as he felt Daniel moving again. This time, the bed dipped on both sides as he straddled Jack, and the heat of his mouth was replaced with a different heat, no less silky and no less slippery as Daniel relaxed and bore down on his dick, encouraging Jack to slide into him with little or no resistance.
Jack surged up to meet him, and again felt that strange tingling deep inside as the intrusion changed position. Intrigued, he shifted his hips, and oh hell yes! Christ, that felt amazing, a thrumming vibration against his prostate as he screwed into Daniel's willing ass. Like fucking and being fucked all at the same time. His gasp of surprised pleasure prompted another throaty chuckle from above him as Daniel leaned forward, sliding his hands up Jack's chest, and kissed him deeply.
"Now you can touch."
At last! His hands groped for Daniel, relishing the smooth warmth of his sweat-slicked skin as they trailed over his chest and down to his hips and grasped them firmly. Now he could really move and he took full advantage, thrusting up smoothly and powerfully, the sensations in his dick amplified and intensified by their mirror in his ass, as he aimed for - and apparently found if the gasps rasping in Daniel's throat were anything to go by - Daniel's prostate.
Daniel leaned forward briefly again, this time to fumble with the blindfold. As Jack blinked to clear his vision in the sudden flood of soft lamplight, the vivid picture of Daniel riding his dick, wild and wanton, arms braced against Jack's chest, head thrown back and teeth bared in a rictus of pleasure, imprinted itself on his brain.
It was too much: he couldn't hold off any longer. Jack stiffened, hissed between his teeth, and then toppled over the edge. But even now, Daniel wasn't finished, it seemed: the sensations in his ass intensified, he was dimly aware of a series of dilations and contractions that doubled and redoubled his orgasm until he thought he was on the verge of passing out. Moments later he felt the hot, sticky splatter of Daniel's come hitting his skin and a sudden increase in weight pressing down on him as Daniel slumped forward, gasping and shuddering, against his chest.
Jack was floating, comfortably heavy-limbed and totally contented with life, the universe and everything, when he gradually became aware of the weight pressing him into the mattress. Not that he minded the weight per se, but it reminded him that he had An Agenda here. He gave an experimental buck and said, "Hey."
"Mmmfnnnn." It was mumbled against his neck, felt rather than heard.
O-kaay, that wasn't exactly an encouraging response. Jack nudged Daniel with his shoulder.
"Hey, Daniel. You with us again?"
Slightly better. Jack gave him a moment or two then tried again.
"Gonna be compos mentis sometime soon?"
Daniel raised his head far enough and long enough to yawn hugely and say, "Yeah, in a minute."
"A long minute or a short minute?"
The look Daniel gave him as he heaved himself upright before flopping sideways onto the bed was pure martyrdom. The effect was spoiled though when he immediately burrowed under Jack's arm and plastered himself against his side, and Jack snickered quietly as Daniel fitted himself to him again. He waited another moment, running his free hand in broad sweeps down Daniel's back and sides, before he asked the question that was uppermost in his mind.
"Daniel, what was that?"
"What did you use on me?"
Daniel lifted himself up onto one elbow and groped behind himself, eventually holding up the string of anal beads with a smug expression on his face. "Yeah, beads. These beads. These beads with weights in them so that they move around inside."
"Holy shit, where in hell do you get these ideas, Daniel?"
Daniel's eyebrows rose as he grinned down at Jack. "You complaining, Jack?"
"Hell no," Jack said hastily. "Not complaining. So not complaining. Haven't got the energy to complain. Just wonderin' is all. In a very relaxed, satisfied, non-complainin' sorta way."
Daniel's smile broadened. "I saw them on the 'net, thought they looked as if they might be fun. Judging by your reactions, I wasn't far wrong."
Jack lazily nodded his agreement as he ran his hand idly down Daniel's side. "Yeah, 'fun' does sorta cover it. Definitely one of your better ideas." He cocked one eyebrow. "You wanna try them too?"
Daniel shrugged, pursing his lips for a moment before he replied with studied casualness, belied by the sudden gleam behind his eyes, "Yeah, I thought about it."
"Good. I wanna see if they have the same effect on you as they had on me."
"Good." Daniel paused for a moment. "Got a time scale in mind there?"
Jack considered, then pursed his lips and shook his head. "No timetable as such. Just expect the unexpected, is all I'm sayin'."
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